In My Own Words...Being Alone

I have to admit, I truly enjoy being alone. I probably like being alone more than most people. But when I'm alone I can relax. I can think. I can breathe.

Being alone gives me the opportunity to put things in perspective. Assess what I need.

The older I get, the more I enjoy my time with myself. The more I find peace in the silence.


When I'm alone I reflect on a lot of things. Decisions I've made (good and bad), where I am in my life, if my life is where I want it to be, and what I want to do in my life.

It's also my time to rest. Rest my body. Rest my mind. Rest my soul.

From the outside looking in some people might assume that I'm bored (or boring). But, that is so far from the truth. What some may call boring I call stress free. My 'Alone Zone' is a 'Drama-Free Zone'.

Whether 'my time' is a 15 minute hot bath, or a 48 hour sabbatical in the bedroom, its something that is mine that can not be taken away from me. Its mine to think about whatever I wish, be bothered with whatever I want (or not), and rejuvenate from the life's wear and tear.



My gift to myself. My 'Calgon' moment for me to get 'taken away.'

In My Own Words....Silence Speaks A Thousand Words

My step sister used to say 'As long as Valerie's arguing with you, you don't have anything to worry about. It's when she stops arguing, you need to worry.'
People who knew me understood what that meant. If Ive stopped arguing, Ive stopped caring. I only argue about what I'm passionate about.

Whether this reaction is right or wrong, that's how I react. When I have gotten to this point, spent energy was wasted energy. When I feel like I'm wasting my energy, time, effort, or what have you. I'm done.

Struggles are a part of life, but when the struggle is unnecessary and recurring (especially if it impacts my life or my comfort zone), the best thing for me is to tap out! Because if I don't, I end up with drama surrounding me, and I hate drama! There are three types of people: Those who like drama (causing drama, being involved with drama); those who say they don't like drama but every time you turn around, what are they involved in? Drama! And those who really don't like drama and avoid it at all costs. I am the latter. I despise drama.

To me, recurring issues equal drama. Its like that saying 'First time, shame on them. Second time, shame on you. Third time, either your ignorant or in denial' (I added the last part myself.)

Now, I understand that life, like most things, is about trial and error. You try one thing and if it doesn't work, your supposed to learn from what didn't work, and try something else. Its the not learning from what didn't work, or not taking responsibility for your part in what didn't work that I have a problem with.

Dealing with repetition, to me, is wasted energy and ultimately I remove myself from that part of the equation. That's when the silence kicks in. Because there's nothing else for me to do. If someone is not going to help me try to keep their boat afloat well, they will have to sink by themselves. Cuz' I refuse to sink!

All I request, at the most, is to acknowledge when something isn't working, and at least an honest effort to try something a little different. If I can't get at least an attempt, If all I get is empty words of what may change in the future when changes need to be made now, I stop arguing. And as my step sister says 'When she stops arguing....'.